Penelope Wilson
Penelope Wilson
November 17, 2020 ·  3 min read

A Soulmate Is Not Someone That Completes You – A Soulmate Is Someone That Inspires You To Complete Yourself

One definition of the word ‘soulmates’ is, “people with deep or natural affinity.” This affinity could include love, romance, platonic relationships, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality, comfort, compatibility, and trust.

It’s a beautiful and apt definition and it’s certainly not responsible for the harmless misconception most people have about soulmate relationships. People believe that a soulmate is someone who fits into the idea of a “better half” in a literal sense, a person who completes you and makes up for all your shortcomings. A person whom you can rely on to pick up the slack where you are failing, and you’re required to pick up their slack as well. They make you feel fulfilled, whole, and entirely complete. They are perfect and different from everyone else you’ve ever met and they feel the same way about you. You may not be in a romantic relationship with this person, but you feel as though your life would be empty and off-track without them.

While this makes up a lot of it, it doesn’t exactly make for a suitable description. A soulmate should be someone who inspires you to complete yourself and patch up your shortcomings, not someone who fills the void and leaves you heavily dependent on them for all-round survival.

Without expressly doing or saying anything to this effect, they make you want to be a better person. They make you eager to own up to your responsibilities. They give you a reason to re-evaluate your values and find comfort in the things that really matter. They inspire you to love yourself and hold your person in high esteem.

A soulmate challenges you to see the potential in yourself

As written by Laura Hinson on Refinery 29: “A soulmate is someone that just gets you. It’s a connection of minds, mutual respect, unconditional love, and total understanding. It’s about being yourself and knowing, not only that person is following and understanding your thoughts but is right there with you, side by side. The soulmate’s relationship is equal; no higher or lower place, just as one.”

This is another beautiful and more accurate definition. Note the parts where it states that a relationship with a soulmate is about being yourself and that both partners are equal. None should be higher or lower than the other. There’s no slave-master atmosphere and you should have mutual respect for each other’s lives and choices.

Your soulmate is that person who boosts your self-esteem and confidence by not judging you. They offer their honest opinions in a non-critical way because they want you to be the best version of yourself.

A soulmate sees you for who you truly are and loves every bit of your personality. The good, the bad, the crazy, the amazing – they ride with everything you embody.

They motivate you to be unconditionally happy. Your soulmate is the one who never wants to see you sad or depressed. They’d move the world if they could, just to see you smile. Even in their absence, you are inspired to find cheer in the smallest things because that is the legacy they’ve left you.

A soulmate encourages you to chase the zenith of your dreams because they believe in you. They want you to believe completely in yourself and go for everything you’ve ever wanted. Your success means the world to them and they’ll celebrate your wins even step of the way.

A true soulmate is proud of you. They are eager to show the world that you are theirs, they are yours, and nothing can put out the twin flames burning in your hearts for each other.

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