“He who knows no hardships will know no hardihood. He who faces no calamity will need no courage. Mysterious though it is, the characteristics in human nature which we love best grow in a soil with a strong mixture of troubles.” – Harry Emerson Fosdick
It can be challenging to find a silver lining when passing through tough times. The truth is, no one prays for problems to arise; neither does anyone wish challenges upon herself. However, we will all go through certain situations that will test every fiber of our being. We will also go through circumstances that will threaten our peace and life as we know it.
But it isn’t all hopeless. Challenges can bring out the best in you and help you become a better woman and a better person. Tough times can build your strength and resilience. It can improve altruism and empathy. It challenges you to be better. It can open the door to a new life and allow you to reconstruct yourself to a more improved version. [1]
You mustn’t allow challenges to change you negatively. When problems come, be thankful for it. When you get betrayed by someone you love, be grateful for it. Maybe that was God’s way of telling you that person isn’t for you. You may not understand right now, but it will all make sense in the end. Be thankful for every closed door, every obstacle, every challenge, and every bump along the way. Determine that nothing will break you. See the potential in every problem, the potential for growth, and firmness. More importantly, the potential to become a strong and independent woman.
When passing through challenges, it is vital to endure and be patient. Tough times don’t last, but tough people do. No matter what challenge you are going through, know that it will never last forever. By the time that problem is over, you will have built a resilience that will aid you in life’s journey. Remember that “Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength.” (Arnold Schwarzenegger)
You can rise from whatever life throws at you. You are not defined by failure. You are much more than that, and you will rise again.
4 Ways to Get Through Tough Times
When we go through tough times, our approach towards it matters a lot. Whether it’s a family conflict, serious illness, or career setback, our actions can go a long way into making it better or worse. These steps below will help you reduce the damage challenges may have caused.
1. Acknowledge your feelings and grief
Several people have cultivated the habit of rationalizing their emotions. In the event of a loss or difficulty, they do not admit themselves to grief and feel that pain, anger, and sadness. They forget that we are all humans and are entitled to feel certain emotions. This, in itself, is wrong. Running away from your emotions will do no good.
According to John Duffy, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and author of the book The Available Parent: Radical Optimism for Raising Teens and Tweens:
“Avoiding your negative emotion may feel like an effective stopgap measure, but in fact, it simply postpones, and perhaps escalates and exacerbates, a flood of negative emotion sometime in the future.” [2]
Rather than ignoring your emotions, face it head-on. Accept your feelings as part of your journey to recovery. That’s the only way to be truly free.
2. Find a trusted person or professional and talk about your problems
One great way to get through tough times is by seeking help or support. Yes, you may not want anybody poking into your emotions or business, but you have to find a trustworthy person to talk to. Individuals that will be there for you through thick and thin. You can seek support from your friends or family. Additionally, you can seek support from a therapist, doctor, or support group. If you are a believer, you can seek God’s help.
“When people bottle up challenging situations, the problems grow and mutate into horrible worries and anxieties. Talking about your troubles, however, helps you better understand your own fears and get valuable feedback from others, “who have probably experienced similar levels of distress and can give you the perspective you need,” said Ryan Howes, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and author of the blog “In Therapy.”
3. Practice self-care
During a period of grief, loss, or challenge, you must practice self-care. Be gentle with yourself. Cut down on stress-inducing activities, take time to eat and sleep properly. Pace yourself in between activities. You can take a 10-minute stroll rather than visit the gym. You can also eat protein bars if you can’t find the appetite for meals. Alternatively, you can decide to meditate. [3]
4. Let go
If you are currently passing through tough times, you will know for sure that certain situations can spiral out of our control quickly. As much one may try to hold on to it, it can come apart in a matter of seconds. There’s no point worrying about what you cannot control; neither is there any reason to keep holding on to it. Let it go! Accept it. Worrying won’t solve anything. Give up control and pay more attention to your decisions and actions.
The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author. They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of this website or its members. The information contained in this article and the presentation of material therein do not imply the expression of any opinion whatsoever on the part of this website.
References
- “The Surprising Benefit Of Going Through Hard Times.” Huff Post. Caroline Gregoire. January 2,2016.
- “Therapists Spill: 14 Ways to Get Through Tough Times.“ Psych Central. Margarita Tarkovsky. October 8, 2018.
- “Getting Through Tough Times.” Psychology Today. Kirsten Bradbury. January 5, 2020.