Stop Spending Time with People Who Deplete Your Energy, Your Confidence, and Your Happiness

Stop Spending Time with People Who Deplete Your Energy, Your Confidence, and Your Happiness

We’d save ourselves a lot of unnecessary heartaches if we understand early enough that not everyone will belong in our lives forever.

 People change, unfortunately, and this is one thing we all have no control over. The fact that you grew up with someone, braved through the travails of college with them, or spent many years working together doesn’t mean you have to tolerate their terrible attitude forever. Familiarity is not an excuse to stick with people who mentally torture you, even if they don’t realize they are doing it. If someone makes you feel bad about yourself or intimidates you in any way, you have every right to stop spending time with them for your own good. 

Friendships and relationships should never be forced. Be with people with whom your soul gravitates toward, not with those who make you feel like fleeing whenever they walk into a room. 

If someone gives you a reason to feel bad or look down on yourself, stop spending time with them

Cut it off with people who are constantly making you doubt yourself, people who can never offer a shred of support when you share your plans with them. It’s either they are convinced that you are not good enough to achieve those goals, or they know you can do it but they just don’t want to see you succeed. It’s awful to discover such personalities in your life, but if they are thriving in your circle, it’s time to cut them off and tighten the loop. [1]

Cut it off with people who deplete your happiness and leave you feeling emotionally exhausted. People could do this in a lot of ways like constantly complaining and nagging about everything, being a naysayer and a killjoy to everyone’s dreams, never having anything good to say, and always finding a reason to hate. Misery can be contagious, and if you’re surrounded by people like this, you’re going to be emptied sooner than you could imagine. [2]

Cut things off with people who make you feel insecure. A friend who always jokes about the things that make you feel conscious of yourself is no friend at all. A person who has no trouble stirring up your insecurities and leaving you feeling exposed shouldn’t be a part of your life.

Cut it off with people who give you low self-esteem by looking down on you and making you look down on yourself. It hurts differently to be surrounded by people who are always showing off what they have or what they’ve achieved. There’s a huge difference between discussing your wins with your friends and simply rubbing it in their faces. Avoid people who act like you are not good enough to be on the same level as them. Even if they are not doing anything outrightly disdainful to this effect, if you feel this way around someone, stay away before you lose your self-esteem completely. [3]

Stay away from selfish and manipulative people. Why do we have to deal with people who only care about their desires and would go to any lengths to get what they want, even if it means burning age-long bridges? They would never engage in any activity if it’s not going to bring them some sort of benefit. In simple words, the world revolves around them.  If you have friends who are always coercing you into doing their bidding or accepting their opinions, you need to put some distance between you and them. [4]

Avoid people who hate it when they see you doing something for yourself. This is another classic act of selfishness that you shouldn’t have to endure. They always want you to be involved in their activities and push for their own growth, but when something good starts happening for you, they get pissed. Hey, you are not anybody’s pawn and if someone can’t be happy for you, they don’t deserve a place in your life.

It’s not always going to be easy to distance yourself from people you’ve known for long. However, it’s essential to your health and wellbeing to avoid people who deplete your energy and happiness. We outgrow certain persons and it doesn’t really matter the relationship we share with them. If they are hurting you, then it’s time to move on. You deserve better.


  1. 6 Signs Your Friend Is An Emotional Vampire—And What To Do About It.” Scary Mommy. Kristie Mae. Retrieved July 2, 2020.
  2. 7 questions that’ll help you decide whether or not to break up with a friend for good.” Business Insider. Ellen Hendriksen. Retrieved July 2, 2020.
  3. 9 Signs It’s Time to End a Friendship, According to Therapists.” Thrive Global. Natalie Lusinski. Retrieved July 2, 2020.
  4. How to Tell If Someone Is Manipulating You—And What to Do About It.Time. Cassie Shortsleeve. Retrieved July 2, 2020.