If we are to be honest with ourselves, we have to admit that a lot of us live in our heads a lot. That’s why we are humans; we are allowed to hope and dream of a fantasy world where everything is flawless and perfect, where people can’t hurt each other, and disappointments are nonexistent. This is our idea of “living our best lives”. Consequently, a lot of people never get to appreciate the beautiful phases of their lives before they are over. Life is full of harsh realities and the earlier you recognize and make peace with each one, the better for your wellbeing.
Before you can truly live your best life and be at peace with existence, here are 15 realities you must accept and quit trying to resist.
1. The grass is greener where you water it
It’s time to cancel out the weird saying that “the grass is greener on the other side”. Sure, it could be, but whoever made that statement didn’t specify what the demarcation was. The grass is greener on the other side of a strong mix of hard work, consistency, determination, and focus. You have to put in the work to get what you want out of life. Sometimes, you may feel as if you’re not doing enough, especially when you go about comparing yourself to others. However, comparison is a useless thief of joy and everyone is running a different race, no matter how similar they may appear. Just stay on your lane, work your way up, and be proud of your little wins.
2. Nobody owes you anything
Cut out the entitlement mentality and stand up for your own wellbeing. Your parents are not going to be responsible for you forever and your friends who have made it in life don’t actually owe you anything. While there’s nothing wrong with needing some assistance once in a while, don’t go about acting like you’re entitled to people’s funds or care. It should genuinely be done out of their own goodwill.
3. People won’t stay forever
Condition your mind to be prepared for people’s exits in your life. Some will move away, others may just decide to stay away from you, and very sadly, people die. Your circle of friends is either going to wane considerably from childhood to your adult years, or it would be repopulated by new people. People come and go. It’s inevitable.
4. Relationships require effort
You can’t just waltz into someone’s life and expect the union to push itself forward. Two people who come together to create something beautiful for each other would certainly have personality disparities. You’d have to put in a lot of work to keep things smooth. You need to be trustworthy, decent to your partner, loving, supporting, and you should require the same courtesies from them.
5. You can never please anyone
No matter how hard you try to be the perfect human, someone somewhere is going to have a reason to dislike you on sight. So, why bother in the first place? Do the thing you want, be the person you want to be, say whatever you need to say at the right time, and the world will eventually adjust.
6. Your physical appearance doesn’t matter as much as your confidence
The way you carry and present yourself bears more weight than the way you’re dressed or your overall appearance. You should try to make people love you for your personality, your good qualities, your kindness, your intelligence, your ability to stay level-headed during a crisis, rather than worrying about the texture of your hair or the shape of your body. Learn to look beyond the surface and see other people for who they truly are.
7. Pride goes before a fall
Every human being has an innate sense of pride within our core. It just shows a lot more in some people and others suppress theirs effectively. For your own benefit, keep your pride aside so it doesn’t prevent you from getting the things you want. You may not like your boss very much but if that job pays your bills for now, swallow your pride and earn your keep. Your partner feels hurt in the relationship but you are blindly convinced you did nothing wrong. Why not extend an olive branch and try to make things better? Call those friends once in a while. You don’t know what they are going through. Listen to your parents – they know you better than you care to imagine. Essentially, just keep your pride aside and things will be a lot easier.
8. Life won’t always be fair
Life is going to suck occasionally and there’s nothing you can do about it. People you love are going to die eventually and this will hurt in a very painful way. You may watch those you started from the bottom with thriving while you struggle. You may experience painful delays and disappointments, but it might become a lot easier when you come to terms with the fact that life is not always going to be easy.
9. Everyone has their own issues to deal with
Stop whining about your problems all the time and channel that energy into finding solutions. Everyone has their own pile of troubles and the last thing anybody needs is someone who will nag infinitely about theirs. You can talk about your issues and seek advice or assistance, but don’t go about acting like the entire world is against you. People will get tired of you too easily.
10. Forgive yourself and be at peace
True happiness comes when you stop beating yourself up over your past mistakes. Nobody has it all perfect and as humans, we are bound to fall out of line occasionally. Let yourself off the hook because that’s the only way to truly find long-lasting peace. Also, no matter how badly you think you have it, you deserve to be happy.
11. Love yourself
Self-love is the ultimate step and it’s not a destination. It’s a continuous process that never ends. Validate yourself and everything you represent. Don’t wait for other people’s approval before you can be the person you want to be. Love your body, keep it fit, dress sexy, dress nerdy, wear your natural hair, dye it purple, be a nonconformist, or be religious – just do whatever you want and be sure you are completely happy.
12. Don’t be afraid of ridicule
You can’t always avoid the occasional judgment and insults – just don’t tolerate them. Don’t be afraid of people having unsolicited and wrongly critical opinions of you or your actions. Just let them know that as long as you didn’t request their opinions, they can stuff it down their throats.
13. Choose your battles wisely
At a certain stage of your life, you’d need to focus your time and energy more appropriately. What are those things worth fighting for? Are you fighting to work your way up the career ladder or fighting over a man or woman with someone else? Are you fighting to keep your family together or fighting to be someone’s best friend? Certain things are not worth the energy, so choose those battles wisely.
14. Be open-minded
Always be ready to view things from a different perspective. This doesn’t mean you have to be easily influenced or convinced, but just have the mental capacity for other points of view. Listen to people’s sides, reason with their understanding, and occasionally put yourself in their shoes. Being close-minded will make you a difficult person to communicate with. Also, accept that you could be wrong sometimes.
15. Always be kind
Kindness is the one religion that everyone can relate with. Kindness is a value, a virtue, and it should be a way of life. Generosity, consideration, and genuine concern for others should never be taken for granted.
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