Stacy Robertson
Stacy Robertson
March 26, 2020 ·  4 min read

7 Effective Ways Intelligent People Deal With Disrespect

Disrespectful people have always been around since the dawn of time. From that colleague dropping odd remarks about your looks to that sibling of yours who is consistently rude and full of arrogance, there’s no restriction to where it can come from. The truth is, disrespect isn’t blinded by familial ties. Spouses disrespect each other, brothers disrespect sisters, and vice-versa. Then there are extended family members who pass their insults subtly or by outrightly exhibiting dismissive attitudes. Disrespect also doesn’t have any color. It knows neither white or black. 

While it will be nice to have a world without rude people, it is merely wishful thinking to hope they would just go away. You will encounter people who will say things that irritate you and rub off wrongly on you. It’s inevitable. The sad part is disrespect affects us psychologically, especially when it comes from those we love.

To let it get to us will cause further damages. Since we can not control the behavior of others, we have to find ways to ensure we do not act in the same way when confronted with disrespect. So what can you do? How do you handle disrespect?

Stay calm

When confronted with a disrespectful situation, you must remain calm. While your first instinct may be to give the person a dose of their own medicine, do not stoop to their level. Regardless of how difficult the situation is, keep your emotions in check. As much as possible, avoid shouting at the other party as it will worsen the situation rather than ameliorate it. 

Do not give in to the drama. Take a deep breath and walk away from that situation with your dignity intact. When you remain calm, the other party will be left with no other option than to stay calm as well.

Show empathy and sympathy

If someone is unusually rude or disrespectful, showing empathy is the way to go. Although it may be challenging to do so, people sometimes go through rough days that bring out the worst in them. While it is certainly no reason for an individual to become disrespectful, it becomes excusable when it’s a one-off thing. Chances are, the person will probably apologize after he has calmed down. 

Remember that you have also had bad days where you were a tad disrespectful to others. You never know what a person might be going through. By sympathizing with them, you will diffuse a situation that could have otherwise gone awry.

Be a shining example

It makes no sense to correct disrespect with disrespect. Whether it is your colleague, your siblings, or your friend, do not be tempted to tow the path of disrespect and rudeness just to get back at them. As hard as it may be, always choose kindness when dealing with disrespectful people. Do not let their attitude contaminate yours, instead show them what kindness is through your actions. While you can’t force an individual to change, you can lead by example. What’s to say they won’t have a rethink when they are confronted with kindness?

Walk away

Sometimes being calm is not just enough. You need to physically remove yourself from a situation to keep things from escalating further. It can be tempting to stick around and defend yourself, but sometimes that does more harm than good. If you find that you are unable to keep calm, drop the conversation, and walk away before you say hurtful words that cannot be taken back after the situation has been diffused.

Offer help

Sometimes people mask their anger and hurt through rudeness. It’s one thing for a person to be habitually rude; it’s another thing when a kind person suddenly changes. Sometimes, you need to look behind that facade and find out if the person is going through a stressful experience. If the person is close to you, you can offer to help them in the best way you can.

Do not hold grudges

Forgive that person who has disrespected you. Forgiveness is more for you than them. Do not keep grudges even when you might be tempted to. Choosing to pay them back at a later date will only create additional problems, and that’s the last thing you should hope for. Forgive and let go.

Avoid the rude individual 

When the situation becomes frequent, and all other options fail, you should consider avoiding the person. If you have tried to bring a person’s rude attitude and actions to his attention, and there have been no changes, it may be that the individual is incapable of good manners. That is on them and not you. By staying away from them, you will take away their audience, and keep confrontations to a minimum.

Staying away from habitually rude people is not a sign of cowardice. Instead, it is an indication of wisdom and emotional intelligence. 

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